Over share

Alright, I still suck at finding a way to post pictures... SOON! I promise. But for this post I'm going to over share. I've been a bit "down in the dumps" lately. There are a couple of reasons for this and I just feel the need to express one of them.

WARNING!!!!!!!!! if you are sensitive to talk about female issues DO NOT READ.

In December I stopped having my period. It came out of no where. I've always been really regular. At this point I stopped taking birth control because I was afraid of damaging a fetus if I did happen to be prego. I had a gyno appointment to renew my Birth control in January so I just waited for that to talk to a doctor. The doctor walked in, and started telling me that I was obese and if I didn't lose the weight I would never have children. She was shocked, shocked, to find that I hadn't gained weight in a long time and yet I'd been regular all my life. This was a huge hit to my self esteem. I was very grateful to Casey that day. She wanted to write me prescriptions. she didn't tell me what they were for or look for a cause because she "knew" it was obesity. After my tears and nap were over I got up, looked in the mirror, turned to Casey and said, "I look just fine!" and after that I was okay but very hesitant to go back to the doctor.

Me after that Doctors appointment.

I had a period in March and then nothing. I finally went to a trusted doctor, Dr. Dianne Farley-Jones, at the end of July. She was great! She talked about my eating habits, took TONS of blood in order to find out what was wrong, and she put me on progesterone. Her guess was that the problem was Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, but she wanted to run some tests and suggested that if that was the problem I go on a strict low carb diet. We then set up a follow up appointment for the end of September.

I got my blood test results about a week later. They were a bit depressing. Of the tests they ran over half were "borderline" or "abnormal". I'm low on Vitamin D, I'm high on Testosterone (yikes, I'm turning into a man!), blah blah blah, no fun. "STRICT low carb diet. carbs coming from fruits and vegetables" was the note on the results.

Basically, she's pretty positive it's Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). If you don't know what that is it's easily google-able. But the run-down is that it causes infertility and Insulin resistance meaning it could lead to Diabetes, cancer, a mustache, etc.. Fixing my insulin levels, and as much as I HATE to admit it, losing some weight will help my fertility. (side note: Yes, I know I have some weight I should lose. However, I do not believe I am Obese. you can talk to me about this because I can get pretty passionate.)

No. Casey and I are not actively trying for pregnancy. It's just scary to think I might be broken and never give Casey his little girl (even if I am hoping for all boys...). Things are getting better; the progesterone caused me to have a period, and I'm hopeful for another one next month. I never thought I'd be "hopeful" for a period. ugh.

The diet blows Goats!!! did you know beans are super high carb? I sure didn't. And for me, beans are my protein source since I don't really eat meat. Low carb and no meat is HARD. I've been eating TONS of salad, TONS of eggs, and my new best friend is Crystal Light. Ugh, I'm even a diet soda drinker. I feel like I've crossed over to the dark side. and by the way, low calorie does NOT mean low carb. No sugar does NOT mean low carb. I am now a label checker. again I say, UGH. No pasta, no potatoes, no beans, no cookies, what's left to live for?!! On a normal 2,000 calorie diet they suggest 250 grams of Carbohydrates. I'm trying to keep mine below 50 most days. sometimes I splurge and do 100. Anyway, it was really hard for the first week... I'm getting better at it though; my average day looks like this. Breakfast: string cheese, grapes, multi-vitamin, orange juice. Lunch: Big salad with lots of greens. Dinner: scrambled eggs with cheese (every 3 days I allow myself to have a piece of whole grain whole wheat toast. Only 15 g of carbs!) Desert: a crystal Light popsicle. I have already lost 15 pounds! So that's something.I bet Darth drinks Diet Sodas.

It has been hard. And it some times gets me down. But I have high hopes and blog, thanks for allowing me to vent. If anyone has any awesome low carb vegetarian meal ideas I'd love to hear them! Sorry for the over share.